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“There’s this disconnect between how things are and how we perceive things." — Ven. Robina

“We’re not suffering because our cup broke, we’re suffering because we thought it shouldn’t." — Ven. Robina

“Given that Buddha’s views are from his own direct experience, from his own observation — they not coming from on high, they’re not speculation, he didn’t make them up — he’s more like Einstein than Jesus." — Ven. Robina

“Everything we think and then do and say is the very process that produces who we become." — Ven. Robina

“The root of the problem is our powerful misconception of an intrinsic me." — Ven. Robina

“So why do you get angry? Because attachment didn’t get what it wanted." — Ven. Robina

“Attachment is a junkie that assumes that I only ever deserve the good things." — Ven. Robina

“If you look in your garden and you see a weed, you would never say “Who put a weed in my garden? I don’t deserve it!” Who planted the seeds? Who planted the weeds? Who planted the flowers? I did." — Ven. Robina

“Our life is our garden. Whatever’s in it, we put it there." — Ven. Robina

“Without understanding karma first, we can’t have proper compassion for others." — Ven. Robina

“We must have compassion for the harmers in this life, because they’ve caused themselves terrible future suffering." — Ven. Robina

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us and, with enormous self respect, we can learn to change, we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“From Buddha’s point of view, we should be weeping in delight every day at how fortunate we are, having such an extraordinarily fortunate life, which we ourselves created by our own past actions.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of everything that goes on in our mind, and the things we do on the basis of those thoughts with our body and speech, this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind: he has a profound and extensive explanation what the mind is, how it functions and how, crucially, we can transform it.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from attachment and the other neuroses: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Don't point to some external thing and call it samsara; point to your own mind, your own body.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“If no anger, then no enemy.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“You are the creator of yourself, honey – that’s what Buddha says.” — Ven. Robina

“We've got to distinguish facts from fiction. And when you're a buddha, you've finally got all the facts down.” — Ven. Robina

“Anger, anxiety, depression and fear break our hearts – and all Buddha is saying is: yes, sweetheart, you can change it.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Our tendencies come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

“The mind, for the Buddha, is where things happen. The mind is where the workshop is: it’s the source of suffering and the source of happiness.” — Ven. Robina

“Any happiness you feel comes from your own mind. It is all manufactured by your own inner factory.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Human beings have great potential; they can do anything. The power of the mind is incredible, limitless.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“When your only purpose for living is the benefit of others, it is very easy to make the right decision. It is easy because you are very clear about why you are alive." — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“There’s a big difference between being able to explain religion intellectually and transforming that knowledge into spiritual experience.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Buddhism is not just about one or two small things; it is not some tiny philosophy. Lord Buddha explained the nature of every single phenomenon in the universe.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Without understanding, belief can be very dangerous. So what Lord Buddha emphasized was that understanding is the path to liberation, knowledge is the path to liberation.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Love is wanting another person to be happy, a delight in their happiness. Love has no strings.” — Ven. Robina

“I hope that you understand what the word 'spiritual' really means. It means to search for – to investigate – the true nature of the mind. There's nothing spiritual outside. My rosary isn't spiritual; my robes aren't spiritual. Spiritual means the mind and spiritual people are those who seek its nature.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“And also, to study Buddhism you don't need to believe in something extreme. It's a matter of investigating, examining and experimenting on yourself. It's not just belief.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us, and out of enormous self respect, we can learn to change the poison; we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of whatever goes on in our mind, and the things we do and say on the basis of those thoughts: this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“We think happiness is what we get when attachment gets what it wants. No. Buddha says happiness is what we get when we give up attachment.” — Ven. Robina

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

What Buddha is saying is that we have this incredible potential, if we have the courage to look inside.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from junk: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind. And he has a profound, deep, extensive explanation and view of what the mind is.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Tendencies in the mind come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical, and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

RobinaCourtin.com

“There’s this disconnect between how things are and how we perceive things." — Ven. Robina

“We’re not suffering because our cup broke, we’re suffering because we thought it shouldn’t." — Ven. Robina

“Given that Buddha’s views are from his own direct experience, from his own observation — they not coming from on high, they’re not speculation, he didn’t make them up — he’s more like Einstein than Jesus." — Ven. Robina

“Everything we think and then do and say is the very process that produces who we become." — Ven. Robina

“The root of the problem is our powerful misconception of an intrinsic me." — Ven. Robina

“So why do you get angry? Because attachment didn’t get what it wanted." — Ven. Robina

“Attachment is a junkie that assumes that I only ever deserve the good things." — Ven. Robina

“If you look in your garden and you see a weed, you would never say “Who put a weed in my garden? I don’t deserve it!” Who planted the seeds? Who planted the weeds? Who planted the flowers? I did." — Ven. Robina

“Our life is our garden. Whatever’s in it, we put it there." — Ven. Robina

“Without understanding karma first, we can’t have proper compassion for others." — Ven. Robina

“We must have compassion for the harmers in this life, because they’ve caused themselves terrible future suffering." — Ven. Robina

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us and, with enormous self respect, we can learn to change, we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“From Buddha’s point of view, we should be weeping in delight every day at how fortunate we are, having such an extraordinarily fortunate life, which we ourselves created by our own past actions.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of everything that goes on in our mind, and the things we do on the basis of those thoughts with our body and speech, this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind: he has a profound and extensive explanation what the mind is, how it functions and how, crucially, we can transform it.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from attachment and the other neuroses: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Don't point to some external thing and call it samsara; point to your own mind, your own body.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“If no anger, then no enemy.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“You are the creator of yourself, honey – that’s what Buddha says.” — Ven. Robina

“We've got to distinguish facts from fiction. And when you're a buddha, you've finally got all the facts down.” — Ven. Robina

“Anger, anxiety, depression and fear break our hearts – and all Buddha is saying is: yes, sweetheart, you can change it.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Our tendencies come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

“The mind, for the Buddha, is where things happen. The mind is where the workshop is: it’s the source of suffering and the source of happiness.” — Ven. Robina

“Any happiness you feel comes from your own mind. It is all manufactured by your own inner factory.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Human beings have great potential; they can do anything. The power of the mind is incredible, limitless.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“When your only purpose for living is the benefit of others, it is very easy to make the right decision. It is easy because you are very clear about why you are alive." — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“There’s a big difference between being able to explain religion intellectually and transforming that knowledge into spiritual experience.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Buddhism is not just about one or two small things; it is not some tiny philosophy. Lord Buddha explained the nature of every single phenomenon in the universe.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Without understanding, belief can be very dangerous. So what Lord Buddha emphasized was that understanding is the path to liberation, knowledge is the path to liberation.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Love is wanting another person to be happy, a delight in their happiness. Love has no strings.” — Ven. Robina

“I hope that you understand what the word 'spiritual' really means. It means to search for – to investigate – the true nature of the mind. There's nothing spiritual outside. My rosary isn't spiritual; my robes aren't spiritual. Spiritual means the mind and spiritual people are those who seek its nature.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“And also, to study Buddhism you don't need to believe in something extreme. It's a matter of investigating, examining and experimenting on yourself. It's not just belief.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us, and out of enormous self respect, we can learn to change the poison; we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of whatever goes on in our mind, and the things we do and say on the basis of those thoughts: this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“We think happiness is what we get when attachment gets what it wants. No. Buddha says happiness is what we get when we give up attachment.” — Ven. Robina

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

What Buddha is saying is that we have this incredible potential, if we have the courage to look inside.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from junk: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind. And he has a profound, deep, extensive explanation and view of what the mind is.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Tendencies in the mind come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical, and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

Q & A With Robina

Each week Ven. Robina answers questions from people around the world.

Your practice is to take care of your special needs children

Jul 29, 2024

QUESTION

Dearest Venerable Robina:

I already have a son in his 20s, but I decided I wanted to adopt another child because I unfortunately was never able to have more of my own. It is very difficult to adopt in my country, but I went through a screening process and was approved.

I was given the opportunity to adopt a child with special needs and I said yes. Multiple families had turned her down for adoption and if I did not say yes she would grow up in an orphanage.

Anyway, I have a question related to my practice: I know it is a matter of prioritizing, and even though I am starting to get into a rhythm with my new daughter, and my son who’s 20 and who’s also special needs, I have little time for my practice. And I don’t have much of an altar: should I?

But slowly a routine started to form that enables me to get up before everyone else and do some shamatha in the morning and a quick Vajrasattva (guided from YouTube) in the evening.

I play mantras for my daughter while we eat breakfast in the hopes of helping her overcome her fears and to steady her.

I feel however that I need to do more, as well as find a way to be more patient and more compassionate – I am not always patient.

I hope you might have some advice.

I do hope this email finds you well and dedicate my practice to you and wishes for your well-being.

Much love

N

ANSWER

Dearest N,

I’m delighted to hear from you!

As for your practice, the fact is your new job of being a mother to a special needs child is a pretty incredible practice. I’m amazed that you took it on. And I’m very impressed by your courage and your compassion. How fortunate she is to have you!

And wonderful that you play mantras for her to hear: such a blessing. Send me a photo of her and you.

Yes, it’s good to have a place where you put a Buddha image and then an offering, some flowers perhaps. That will do for an altar — don’t worry about anything else. It’s a nice focus point, that’s all: it reminds you.

In the morning take Refuge and do your meditation, that’s enough. And the night is perfect: the purification practice.

Your day is your practice, that is for sure!

Much love to you,

Robina

QUESTION

Dear Venerable Robina

Thank you for your last response, it has helped me a lot.

My daughter is doing a lot better. When I first adopted her she did few things other than scream or throw things. One day while she was crying and screaming and I was holding her I had run out of things I knew to do.

So I started reciting Om mani peme hum and she immediately calmed and has since asked for me to say it several times. Most of the things that made other families decline to adopt her disappeared in the year she has been with me.

She is a sweet and caring child and she is trusting and loving. She has recently asked for a Buddha figure of her own and since she is very interested in light I have given her one that lights up.

I hope you are well and happy.

Much love

N

ANSWER

Dear N,

So glad to hear from you. And good to see the photo of you and your daughter.

The fact that she has calmed down since the mantras: that’s pretty incredible. And her interest in the Buddha is evident: it shows she must have a strong connection with the Dharma, so it is fortunate that she has come to you.

Keep moving, N, you are doing so beautifully!

Much love,

Robina

More Q & A

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QUESTION Hello Venerable Robina I’ve been listening to your teachings for several years. I am in therapy right now; I’m consistently having deep rooted issues with my self-esteem. My therapist is suggesting that it is important for me to express my thoughts, feelings,...

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