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“There’s this disconnect between how things are and how we perceive things." — Ven. Robina

“We’re not suffering because our cup broke, we’re suffering because we thought it shouldn’t." — Ven. Robina

“Given that Buddha’s views are from his own direct experience, from his own observation — they not coming from on high, they’re not speculation, he didn’t make them up — he’s more like Einstein than Jesus." — Ven. Robina

“Everything we think and then do and say is the very process that produces who we become." — Ven. Robina

“The root of the problem is our powerful misconception of an intrinsic me." — Ven. Robina

“So why do you get angry? Because attachment didn’t get what it wanted." — Ven. Robina

“Attachment is a junkie that assumes that I only ever deserve the good things." — Ven. Robina

“If you look in your garden and you see a weed, you would never say “Who put a weed in my garden? I don’t deserve it!” Who planted the seeds? Who planted the weeds? Who planted the flowers? I did." — Ven. Robina

“Our life is our garden. Whatever’s in it, we put it there." — Ven. Robina

“Without understanding karma first, we can’t have proper compassion for others." — Ven. Robina

“We must have compassion for the harmers in this life, because they’ve caused themselves terrible future suffering." — Ven. Robina

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us and, with enormous self respect, we can learn to change, we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“From Buddha’s point of view, we should be weeping in delight every day at how fortunate we are, having such an extraordinarily fortunate life, which we ourselves created by our own past actions.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of everything that goes on in our mind, and the things we do on the basis of those thoughts with our body and speech, this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind: he has a profound and extensive explanation what the mind is, how it functions and how, crucially, we can transform it.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from attachment and the other neuroses: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Don't point to some external thing and call it samsara; point to your own mind, your own body.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“If no anger, then no enemy.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“You are the creator of yourself, honey – that’s what Buddha says.” — Ven. Robina

“We've got to distinguish facts from fiction. And when you're a buddha, you've finally got all the facts down.” — Ven. Robina

“Anger, anxiety, depression and fear break our hearts – and all Buddha is saying is: yes, sweetheart, you can change it.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Our tendencies come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

“The mind, for the Buddha, is where things happen. The mind is where the workshop is: it’s the source of suffering and the source of happiness.” — Ven. Robina

“Any happiness you feel comes from your own mind. It is all manufactured by your own inner factory.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Human beings have great potential; they can do anything. The power of the mind is incredible, limitless.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“When your only purpose for living is the benefit of others, it is very easy to make the right decision. It is easy because you are very clear about why you are alive." — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“There’s a big difference between being able to explain religion intellectually and transforming that knowledge into spiritual experience.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Buddhism is not just about one or two small things; it is not some tiny philosophy. Lord Buddha explained the nature of every single phenomenon in the universe.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Without understanding, belief can be very dangerous. So what Lord Buddha emphasized was that understanding is the path to liberation, knowledge is the path to liberation.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Love is wanting another person to be happy, a delight in their happiness. Love has no strings.” — Ven. Robina

“I hope that you understand what the word 'spiritual' really means. It means to search for – to investigate – the true nature of the mind. There's nothing spiritual outside. My rosary isn't spiritual; my robes aren't spiritual. Spiritual means the mind and spiritual people are those who seek its nature.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“And also, to study Buddhism you don't need to believe in something extreme. It's a matter of investigating, examining and experimenting on yourself. It's not just belief.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us, and out of enormous self respect, we can learn to change the poison; we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of whatever goes on in our mind, and the things we do and say on the basis of those thoughts: this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“We think happiness is what we get when attachment gets what it wants. No. Buddha says happiness is what we get when we give up attachment.” — Ven. Robina

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

What Buddha is saying is that we have this incredible potential, if we have the courage to look inside.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from junk: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind. And he has a profound, deep, extensive explanation and view of what the mind is.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Tendencies in the mind come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical, and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

RobinaCourtin.com

“There’s this disconnect between how things are and how we perceive things." — Ven. Robina

“We’re not suffering because our cup broke, we’re suffering because we thought it shouldn’t." — Ven. Robina

“Given that Buddha’s views are from his own direct experience, from his own observation — they not coming from on high, they’re not speculation, he didn’t make them up — he’s more like Einstein than Jesus." — Ven. Robina

“Everything we think and then do and say is the very process that produces who we become." — Ven. Robina

“The root of the problem is our powerful misconception of an intrinsic me." — Ven. Robina

“So why do you get angry? Because attachment didn’t get what it wanted." — Ven. Robina

“Attachment is a junkie that assumes that I only ever deserve the good things." — Ven. Robina

“If you look in your garden and you see a weed, you would never say “Who put a weed in my garden? I don’t deserve it!” Who planted the seeds? Who planted the weeds? Who planted the flowers? I did." — Ven. Robina

“Our life is our garden. Whatever’s in it, we put it there." — Ven. Robina

“Without understanding karma first, we can’t have proper compassion for others." — Ven. Robina

“We must have compassion for the harmers in this life, because they’ve caused themselves terrible future suffering." — Ven. Robina

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us and, with enormous self respect, we can learn to change, we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“From Buddha’s point of view, we should be weeping in delight every day at how fortunate we are, having such an extraordinarily fortunate life, which we ourselves created by our own past actions.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of everything that goes on in our mind, and the things we do on the basis of those thoughts with our body and speech, this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind: he has a profound and extensive explanation what the mind is, how it functions and how, crucially, we can transform it.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from attachment and the other neuroses: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Don't point to some external thing and call it samsara; point to your own mind, your own body.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“If no anger, then no enemy.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“You are the creator of yourself, honey – that’s what Buddha says.” — Ven. Robina

“We've got to distinguish facts from fiction. And when you're a buddha, you've finally got all the facts down.” — Ven. Robina

“Anger, anxiety, depression and fear break our hearts – and all Buddha is saying is: yes, sweetheart, you can change it.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Our tendencies come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

“The mind, for the Buddha, is where things happen. The mind is where the workshop is: it’s the source of suffering and the source of happiness.” — Ven. Robina

“Any happiness you feel comes from your own mind. It is all manufactured by your own inner factory.” — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Human beings have great potential; they can do anything. The power of the mind is incredible, limitless.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“When your only purpose for living is the benefit of others, it is very easy to make the right decision. It is easy because you are very clear about why you are alive." — Lama Zopa Rinpoche

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“There’s a big difference between being able to explain religion intellectually and transforming that knowledge into spiritual experience.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Buddhism is not just about one or two small things; it is not some tiny philosophy. Lord Buddha explained the nature of every single phenomenon in the universe.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“Without understanding, belief can be very dangerous. So what Lord Buddha emphasized was that understanding is the path to liberation, knowledge is the path to liberation.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

“Love is wanting another person to be happy, a delight in their happiness. Love has no strings.” — Ven. Robina

“I hope that you understand what the word 'spiritual' really means. It means to search for – to investigate – the true nature of the mind. There's nothing spiritual outside. My rosary isn't spiritual; my robes aren't spiritual. Spiritual means the mind and spiritual people are those who seek its nature.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“And also, to study Buddhism you don't need to believe in something extreme. It's a matter of investigating, examining and experimenting on yourself. It's not just belief.” — Lama Thubten Yeshe

“We have the power to look into our own minds, to recognize what harms us, and out of enormous self respect, we can learn to change the poison; we can learn to get rid of the neuroses. This is all Buddha is saying.” — Ven. Robina

“Every microsecond of whatever goes on in our mind, and the things we do and say on the basis of those thoughts: this is the karmic process.” — Ven. Robina

“We think happiness is what we get when attachment gets what it wants. No. Buddha says happiness is what we get when we give up attachment.” — Ven. Robina

“Positive states of mind are natural to us. They are at the core of our being. They are what define our mind. They are what we really are.” — Ven. Robina

“Not believing in the way things appear to us: you can't get more radical than that.” — Ven. Robina

“The main cause of my happiness, the main cause of my suffering, is in my mind.” — Ven. Robina

What Buddha is saying is that we have this incredible potential, if we have the courage to look inside.” — Ven. Robina

“Happiness is the mind that is free from junk: clear, blissful, happy and stable.” — Ven. Robina

“Buddha's expertise is the mind. And he has a profound, deep, extensive explanation and view of what the mind is.” — Ven. Robina

“We accept we come fully programmed into this life, but we think the programming comes from mother and father. It doesn’t, Buddha says. Tendencies in the mind come from previous moments of that very mind itself, which is not physical, and not from any external condition.” — Ven. Robina

Q & A With Robina

Each week Ven. Robina answers questions from people around the world.

Searching for approval at the workplace

Jun 24, 2019

QUESTION Hello Ven. Robina. It has been quite a while since I’ve been in touch. I really hope you are doing well. I’ve been keeping up my practice each day, which I’m grateful to have. 

It seems I’ve run into the same problem at my work – without going into detail it has been quite stressful. It’s just extremely busy and non-stop! I don’t mean to complain because it’s a great firm and I’m lucky to have such a job but something about it just doesn’t gel with me. I can’t quite be myself. I’m not very corporate! 

I’m not sure if I should push through and keep going and see what happens down the line, or go to a smaller firm, or look at retraining, and maybe taking some college courses. I think you once said to me “it’s clear you don’t like these corporate jobs.” I keep trying to make it work. I haven’t really been fulfilled in my work since I left journalism, but I’ve been too long out of the game. 

How do I know which way to go? 

VEN. ROBINA Good to hear from you.

But isn’t it the same problem as usual? No matter what job you have, you’re never quite satisfied? 

This is samsara! Nothing is perfect. You will never ever ever find the perfect job. Perhaps you can practice – literally, every day – spelling out to yourself the good things about it. Then your mind will change – abracadabra! That’s how practice works! I’m serious.

On the other hand, if you don’t like the work, leave. That’s it. Make the decision. You can get another job.

Love,
Robina

QUESTION Thanks, Ven. Robina. Yes it’s the same problem! I’m going to focus on the 10 good things about this job and watch my mind. I keep thinking if I leave, the same thing will happen at the next job, as it has in the past. I will try to hang in here and use it in my practice. 

VEN. ROBINA Just keep moving, one step at a time.

QUESTION Thank you Ven. Robina. Just some practical advice – what is the best way to react to co-workers when they are very stressed over their work etc.? It’s quite a stressed and, at times, aggressive atmosphere that I work in, and I tend to take it on myself (as I’m already quite an anxious person!). I understand this is karma and my view of the world but what is the best approach from a Dharma perspective? Is it compassion?

VEN. ROBINA What do you mean, specifically, when you say “when they are very stressed over their work”?

QUESTION I mean that the work demands are extremely high for my team – the atmosphere there feels very urgent and the culture is very “high performing;” our bosses expect the very best in everything we do. My team approaches their work with urgency and it can feel aggressive when there is a lot going on (that is my perception in any case, meaning people can get short when dealing with each other at times). Adding to the stress, we are doing more with less as a number of people have now left my team to go elsewhere. I’m working as hard as I can, but sometimes it doesn’t feel like it is enough! 

I’m just wondering what is the best way to react to my colleagues when they’re stressed, angry etc.?

VEN. ROBINA Well, what I’m hearing is a wonderful description of devoted, hard-working sincere people doing their best! Wow. 

Attachment works in many ways, and yours wants everything to be nice and manageable. So your job is to not be afraid of all the energy. Relax! Enjoy it! Love and praise your team. Support them. 

Do you understand?

QUESTION Thanks, Ven. Robina. Yes, I understand. They are a very hard working team. What if sometimes the aggression is directed at me?  

VEN. ROBINA Be brave! This is life! Be brave. In these tense situations, as you say, people get energized.

But explain the aggression – once, daily, many times, etc., Explain.

QUESTION I guess I am referring to my boss – I’ve been trying to connect with her and get along with her more. She has a lot of pressure in her life (kids, husband, very busy job) and she seems angry a lot of the time; she’s very intense, and can sometime say cutting things. I don’t think I’m someone she relates to.  

I assume this is all karma and what my mind is perceiving… which is the usual case of “they don’t like me.”

I’m trying to be brave and just get on with doing a good job. I just find it very challenging!

VEN. ROBINA This is good for you. All you’re doing is begging her to like you, then you will think you must be a good girl. Well, you’re a good girl already, you don’t need her approval to prove it to yourself!

Have compassion for her. But be clear and steady and strong within yourself. Then she can’t hurt you.

It’s your practice.

QUESTION Thank you Ven. Robina. This is very helpful. I really struggle with being steady and strong within myself – it feels so much easier and safer to run and get approval all the time. But it’s exhausting and feeds the doubt I have about myself. 

I will be strong in myself!

More Q & A

Understanding the meaning of the seed syllable

QUESTION Dear Ven. Robina, After my retreat, I have spent two weeks completely cleaning out my little house. I got rid of many things. I felt the need to make space and make it more orderly and elegant, as you told me. And to give it a new shape. The more I tidied up...

I want to ordain but I’m too old

QUESTION Dear Robina, I have been following you as my root guru. I am seeing your guidance on how to purify my past karma from before I became a Buddhist and all that entails. Love, L ANSWER Most dear L: I’m delighted to hear from you. And I’m so pleased the teachings...

How to remove yellowjackets living in my house

QUESTION Dearest Venerable, If it is possible I'd like to request advice. Beside our front door there is a crevice that yellowjackets have inhabited inside the wall. I made the mistake of thinking they were native docile bees but now I see that they're not. The only...

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QUESTION Hello Venerable Robina I’ve been listening to your teachings for several years. I am in therapy right now; I’m consistently having deep rooted issues with my self-esteem. My therapist is suggesting that it is important for me to express my thoughts, feelings,...

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QUESTION Dearest Robina I have been following you now for some time. I am writing to you because you seem to be an ordinary person, like me, and you know what it is to live life. I met His Holiness and my life changed. I have taken refuge and bodhisattva vows. I was...

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