QUESTION
Dear precious Robina,
I would like to reach out to you today, if I may.
Deep within me, there is a great fear of death that often entraps me. Every day, I contemplate the inevitability of my mortality and the prospect of losing everything.
I cherish life profoundly, and this attachment is undoubtedly a significant reason for my fear of death. I try to recall the words of teachings and your insights on death, yet it remains challenging for me to cope with.
Perhaps you could provide me with essential guidance. I acknowledge the truth in what you’ve said – nothing is eternal, nothing is permanent, and essentially, nothing truly exists. I also remind myself that while the body may perish, consciousness endures infinitely.
Your assistance in navigating these thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
In love,
I
ANSWER
I understand, I!
You’re right: the only reason there is fear is because we have this fierce attachment to life and to people and things, and that of course causes us to grasp so strongly to them and to dread losing them.
Another way of putting is we have fear only because we’re not aligned with reality. The reality is that things change second by second. But by grasping at them, we’re living in the denial of that reality.
The suffering is in that disconnect. So painful!
So, first step is to remember again and again that we will die: face it, accept it, don’t resist it. It’s a fact.
Second – and this is the crucial one – instead of buying into the instinctive fear, we need to train our mind to think differently. In other words, we need to consciously decide, say the words, “Therefore, I must not waste this precious life, I must make the most of it, instead of living in the dread of the end of it.”
With this approach, we accept the reality of death and then turn it into a positive. Because we will die, and that could be today, we mustn’t waste it. This way, we have enthusiasm to make the most of our life. We’ll even enjoy life more!
Accepting death doesn’t mean just sitting there waiting for it to happen. Accepting death means deciding not to waste this precious human life while we’ve got it.
Of course, this shift in thinking takes much time, because attachment is so primordial. It’s very precise thinking, and it works.
What do you think, I?
Love,
Robina
QUESTION
Dear precious Robina,
Yes, it’s exactly as you say, and I know it, yet I don’t want to accept it.
It’s the way it is because I want to cling to something that doesn’t actually exist.
The present state, the unchanging nature of things – these thoughts are deeply rooted in me, but I will definitely make an effort to improve my attitude and understanding because it’s worth it.
I think about it every day, that it won’t stay as it is. I try to lead a life where I can help others even more.
Yet, there is still fear, but perhaps I should just accept it.
Your words, precious Robina, are like wings that can carry me beyond that fear.
Thank you, and I will practice!
Yours,
I
ANSWER
Perfect, I!