QUESTION
Dear Venerable,
I hope this email finds you well.
Following one of the teachings I attended via Zoom, one participant asked something related to Lama Osel and the FPMT.
I know that people are not perfect, in any religion. But I am struggling to come to terms with some things I read online: sexual abuse, emotional abuse and even rumors about His Holiness the Dalai Lama, which I did not want to finish reading to worsen my mental state regarding all of this.
I know the right way forward is to have compassion and understand that no one is perfect and even in Buddhism there might be some people acting with wrong views, etc.
How to deal with these rumors? Could they be true? How to distinguish news from gossip? Any advice is most welcome. Thank you very much.
Kindest regards,
Y
ANSWER
Dearest Y,
I understand.
I’m close to Lama Osel Rinpoche since he was 2 years old. And I’ve been close to my vajra brothers and sisters on the board of directors of the FPMT for even longer.
All I can do is not hold a position — I don’t know all the facts — and respect everyone involved.
And, of course, if we do know facts and we can see there’s a way to help, then with wisdom and compassion we must do it.
What do you think?
Love to you,
Robina
QUESTION
Dear Robina,
I totally understand. And I don’t expect anyone to take sides. I myself don’t take anyone’s side as I don’t think it is my place.
My question is more about keeping my motivation and trust in the process in view of these rumors and accusations related to Buddhism. I understand that some might be true and some might not. Honestly I don’t want to know which is true or not. That is not the point of this conversation either. The point is how do I keep myself motivated?
I guess in my mind, unconsciously I expect everybody to be perfect. All Shakyamuni Buddhas! But this is just not the reality we live. In all corners of our society we will have bad apples. I get it. But how do you keep motivated in view of all this? Thank you very much.
Kindest regards,
Y
ANSWER
Yes, I understand, Y.
The Buddhist world is full of amazing examples of the efficacy of the teachings.
It’s also full of ordinary beings who have faults, just as you say.
I’ve found that the more I study the teachings and the more I try to practice, the more confidence I have in the path and the more compassion I have for others.
This is the world, nothing new, nothing special.
Your confidence has to come from the teachings, from knowing them, thinking about them, trusting their logic from your own experience.
And that confidence is hugely strengthened when we see the examples such as His Holiness, Lama Zopa Rinpoche and the other holy beings. This is the key. They are the proof.
And a major component, which comes from understanding karma, the delusions, and emptiness, is that we have very very limited capacity to see reality.
One of the most powerful practices, as Lama Zopa Rinpoche recommends, is to not believe in our karmic appearances.
It all just takes time.
What do you think?
Love,
Robina
QUESTION
Dear Robina,
Thank you for your answer.
Yes, it makes sense that my confidence has to come from the teachings and my own experience. This is what was missing in my head to connect the dots. Thank you for this.
No one is perfect, after all this is samsara. But through studying the teachings and applying in my daily life I am able to keep the confidence and trust the process.
I appreciate very much your time for answering my questions. I feel much better now and stronger to carry on and not give up. Thank you again.
Love,
Y
ANSWER
It’s not easy, Y.
Our favorite activity is to see the world through the lenses of attachment and aversion: we just can’t help it until we’re pretty advanced.
The second our poor little attachment, like an infant, doesn’t get what it wants, aversion is the panic attack that arises, and we find fault.
The more we realize this, the more effective is the advice to not believe in what appears to us.
And it brings compassion. We’re all in the same boat.
Rxx
PS: And you can read this letter from Lama Osel – oselhita.com/letter-march-16-2025/
Things are never truly how we think when our minds are limited.
Rx
QUESTION
Oh wow! That is a beautiful letter. I am really glad I started this conversation with you, Robina. It has been very helpful.
Things are never truly how we think when our minds are limited – So true! I have so much faith in this sentence.
My work is to study and practice more and more and hopefully one day my mind will be less limited and confused.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Love,
Y