QUESTION
Dear Venerable Robina,
Hoping this finds you well. I’m having a hard time dealing with something. My mother passed recently. We’ve just discovered that she gambled away all the family money in bad investments. My father is old and refuses to acknowledge this.
Should I help him understand this? He needs to face these facts, doesn’t he? Should he have to deal with it before he passes away?
I’m so worried about this predicament!
With love,
L
ANSWER
Dearest L:
Glad to hear from you.
As for your mother: I don’t know her motivation, but maybe she meant well, I don’t know — I mean, she didn’t gamble on horses!
Let your father be. He doesn’t need to come to terms with it. Just be kind and loving and help him be peaceful. Tell him what a good father and husband he has been. The main thing now in his old age is to be peaceful, then he can die with a happy mind and that will help trigger a virtuous karmic seed and help him get a good human rebirth. That’s the main thing now.
Forget about facing facts: this doesn’t help him one bit. And why is it a predicament? It’s all the past, it’s over, your mother’s dead, your father is old and moving towards death. Nothing to fix!
Much love,
Robina